The Stories I Don't Write

In my mind and heart, I'm a writer. But I'm imperfect and confused. I settle for quasi-reporting of personal experiences and social commentary. But I feel that it's distraction from the stories - the stories I don't write.

I'm a storyteller with nothing more than fragments and glimpses of people and worlds I assume don't exist and haven't had told to me before.  I assume my subconscious is not lifting ideas already created, though that is difficult in a late modern age with seven billion people. It's all been done before, I'll tell myself. Maybe it's too much for me clear this clutter from my mind to tell a complete story.  It's exhausting.

I've got a couple of short stories that I've completed and countless others that have been outlined and half baked. For spells of time, I'll obsess over these stories and characters. I've let them consume me as I fantasize their environments and related chains of events.  I'll ride the bus so I can stare out the window for 45 minutes or so a day and let my mind wander and wonder. Most of the time I end up with noteworthy yet incomplete ideas.  Somehow that is comforting.

I've got a story about a missionary who comes back from a mission trip and brings some deity with her. There's another one  with a farmer who experiences a head injury and from that head injury, a mythic world literal pours out around him.  I've got a story about an old man and his subterranean obsessions and a story about the cultural impact a couple of off putting rural singers who are sisters.  It's all pure fantasy and science fiction.  Worse still, it's likely all derivative tripe that is successful in only communicating my immaturity as a story teller and writer.  I tell myself, does the world really need more of this?  

What I do commit to paper is often rambling and too lengthy.  I've really tried to write short stories and keep things brief.  However, I get bogged down somehow.  I'll start writing and then get lost in it.  I'll then start editing things for the sake of brevity.  But as I edit, I lose touch with my ideas and end up waste deep in something without direction.  I struggle finding resolution with some of my stories.  I'm good at formulating ideas, but not stringing together narratives with satisfying endings. A lot of my stories are dreams which is probably part of my problem.  They are environments and characters that I dream up, sans a sequence of sensible events.  Hey listen to me complain about these awesome dreams I have and are able to remember.

But somehow I'm content with all of this. If it's meant to happen, it's meant to happen. I'm happy keeping my worlds and characters to myself. My only challenge is that I want to be able to distill these fragments into stories I can tell my kids.  They believe anything I tell them.

Think Kit Day 5 - Aloha, Audrey!

We know enough good people out there not having kinds and felt compelled to expand our population footprint to compensate.  Just kidding on the motivation. We brought a third Ford girl into the world and I know she's going to be as a strong and amazing as our other two.  Aloha, Audrey!

This post is part of ThinkKit by Smallbox. Today’s prompt: “What did you say goodbye to this year? Was it a bad habit? A '94 hatchback? Or something less tangible? How did you feel the day after? The week after? 

Or! What did you say hello to this year? Did it enrich your life...or detract? A new favorite possession? A tattoo? Did you decide that your life was missing something, or did you just fall into new-ness?"

Think Kit Day 4 - Words By Which I'm Living

Spend money on experiences, not stuff.  

Here we have an influential statement that left its mark this year. I don’t really know from where I picked it up.  A simple Google search confirms this is not a new concept.  Nonetheless, it’s a statement that has validated a number of decisions we’ve made in recent past while informing future decisions.

It’s not full proof, but it’s still sound advice.  If you downplay or even shun consumer culture with this as your mantra it feels like you’re really buying into an information culture.  You run the risk of coveting the photos or the curated online persona.  It seems the phrase is not really an exercise in non-attachment, as you create an emphasis on the pictures, the videos, the journal entries about the experiences.  Is this bad?  I guess it depends on your attitude and preference toward non-attachment.

So while my 2014 self can't claim that this mantra is a true exercise in non-attachment, spending money on experiences and not stuff has created clarity in thought and less clutter in the home.  It feels like the right move.

This post is part of ThinkKit by Smallbox. Today’s prompt: “Whether you asked for it – or not – what good advice did you get this year? Did it come from an unexpected source?"

Think Kit Day 3 - It only took me 6 months at my new job to spill beer on the ceiling (VIDEO)

You want a laugh?  I give you, "Employee Beer Explosion (no sound)."  It's a masterful short piece that captures surprise and humility, all in the time span of a few minutes. I'm six months into my new job and I've got a project team member who is giving up a Friday night to do some after hours work that popped up at the last minute.  So, I thought I would give him a six pack of some local IPA flair as a thank you.  Well, take a look at the security camera footage my kind hearted co-workers obtained, edited, and shared throughout the building while I was home showering and changing.

No glass was broken, merely my pride!  It was a pretty good laugh all in all, even at the time it all occurred.  Ah, the memories.

This post is part of ThinkKit by Smallbox. Today’s prompt: “share a side-splitting story from the last year. What made you laugh out loud until tears formed? What made you giggle every time it was referenced? Whether it's a story, an image, a video – we want to hear about the banana peel on the floor, your best practical joke, or gems from the mind of a three-year-old. Whether it's sassy, sarcastic, or just plain silly: make us laugh!”

Think Kit Day 2 - From Paper to the Cloud

I'm going to avoid diving deep on a couple of social or local issues.  It's day two, after all. Everyone is expecting it and I won't be able to resist the urge to through the end of the month.  That being said, I've another mind shift that occurred this past year. It's a small change that contributes to larger scale success. I've gone paperless at work.  I've seriously printed two documents in an entire year while at a job with perhaps twice as much information flowing my way.  Prior to that, I would drown in a sea of paper and lost so much informational value in the unbelievable amount of reports, notes, plans, etc. that would accumulate on my desk.  Granted I moved from a large financial services organization to a small, tech savvy consulting firm but it was still project oriented technology work - and a lot of it thus leading me to believe that the system is a primary contributor.  

I've perfected my cocktail. It's all about Evernote, Box, and Trello (apps I've blogged about before). This trifecta of applications has replaced mounds and mounds of paper that I would have printed in a previous life.  These are popular, cloud based document and information organizing tools that only become easier to leverage as they evolve.

Through the tagging, the sharing, and the synching in the cloud I've found peace of mind and a less stressful and more effective work scenario.  These tools aren't new and neither are the concepts. What's new is my dedication to them this past year and as a result, a significantly smaller amount of paper consumed.

This is actually an important development, whether you work in a fast paced environment that's where the information flow never stops or you have a need to manage multiple detailed initiatives.  Abandoning paper for the cloud is a very operational shift.  It's a seemingly benign change that really impacts my larger game. I'm consciously looking to cultivate a "get things done" reality and abandoning paper has helped pave the way.

This post is part of ThinkKit by Smallbox. Today’s prompt: “What did you change your mind about this year? Was it a big deal – the way you feel about an issue? Or something small ?”

Think Kit Day 1 - Being a Hype Man for Indianapolis Through My Year in Pictures

I'm using my year in photos post to hype up a few things I like about my city. As an added benefit for friends and family (28% of which would be interested in seeing pictures of my family), you get some pictures of my awesome family.  Besides, the only way to make family photos interesting to strangers is to frame them up against some of my favorite aspects of our great city.

Downtown Carriage Ride

For Margot's birthday, we took a horse drawn carriage ride around the downtown area.  The ride was a first for us.  For as much time as I've spent near the circle, that was a nice angle to experience the area.

Victory Field

What a great minor league park we've got.  The outfield experience is ideal for our group of friends and family.

Pappa Roux

This is a two for one photo.  I get to promote this east side restaurant as well as give you a glimpse into my awesome dad time.

Downtown Comics

Great selection and great staff.  Note my use of My Little Pony comics as a gateway drug.

Holliday Park

We own a bunch of city parks on the north side.  And Holliday park could have topped the list this year.  We love it for its nature center, playground, its "ruins", and the river front.

My Street

We've lived in the south east corner of Meridian-Kessler for over ten years now.

St. Joan of Arc's French Market

Year after year, this is our favorite festival on the summer circuit.

100 Acre Wood (and all the outdoor IMA grounds)

What a great way to spend a random weekend afternoon.

This post is part of ThinkKit by Smallbox. Today’s prompt: “Share your year in photos. Was there a moment of unrestrained happiness? An unexpected encounter?”

#citysuppersindy - Ford Edition

People don't get to do this often and I admire Allison and her college era friends when they get together. We're all IU Bloomington alumni and ran in the same circles back in the day, but over time the circle has stretched from Manhattan to Chicago and so on.  While many were missing at our dinner, those converging at the Ford house this past weekend celebrated new babies and old friendships.  So with some delicious homemade beef stew and ice cream brownie sundaes, we reminisced about the past, caught up with the present, and talked about tomorrow.  Our frequent dinners with friends and family are successful when conversation is rooted in this complete chronological set - the past, present, and future.

Dinner courtesy of our friend Jamie

cheers!